Catching Butterflies
by Kaylarea
Summary: Gil realizes how much he needs Sara, but is it too late because she may no longer be there. GSR I promise.
1. Chapter 1

**Thank you Moochiecat! You rock!**

She didn't know how long she laid there, just watching him in total awe. Considering their history she knew it was fruitless to even hope, but she couldn't help the fact that he was simply "the one." She knew the effect she could have on any man, but those men weren't what she wanted. They never were. Try as she might, each time she went out with someone she would invariably end up comparing them to him. Not that they were bad dates, or guys even. It wasn't that at all, but rather they weren't _the_ guy for her.

She'd had a great time going out with other men, but they couldn't make her feel the way she felt when he looked at her. So she took great care to commit him to her memory, because, at this rate, those memories would be all she had. Even if she survived.

She loved the way his hair was all one shade of deep brown, except at the base of his neck and at his temples, where gray was starting to poke through. She knew she never would forget the way he saved his dimpled and crooked smile just for her, or how his eyes twinkled when he was excited or learned something new. It made her wonder what he must have looked like as a child. Probably much like he did now, or so she would assume.

Sara was pulled from her thoughts by his voice - the only voice she was responding too at the moment. The voice that always had her full attention, instantly.

"Sara, honey. Try not to move. You've got a few gun shot wounds to your leg and you hit your head pretty hard." Gil told her as he cradled her head in his lap.

She tried to concentrate on what he was saying, but all she could notice was the curve of his lips. Sara felt like she was underwater, trying to get to the surface and air. Everything around her seemed muffled. Like someone had turned down the volume of the world, or at the very least this crime scene.

Sara was trying to form a complete thought and turn it into a sentence, but all she got when she attempted to speak was a rough, cracked whisper of broken words. She wasn't sure what she should say to him, but she did know that she was bleeding out and had head trauma - not a good mix. So she knew that whatever she did tell him, it damn well had better mean something, if not to him, than to her. Just in case.

"Gil?," She started, catching his attention immediately, because she never called him anything other than "Grissom".

"I..thank you...I want.. you to..know... I love... you." She managed to get out, though not as eloquently or completely as she would have hoped for before blacking out. His face was the last thing she saw.

"Sir?," The paramedic tried again to gain Grissom's attention. "We need to take her with us now, to the Coroner. She is no longer with us. Please, let her go."

Grissom finally took his gaze off of her face. Sara's face. The most beautiful face he had ever seen. She wasn't just physically beautiful to him, but emotionally and intellectually as well. He had finally heard the words come from her that he had always longed to hear, but had never deserved or been able to return, until now. He knew she was gone. They had told him so, but he couldn't and wouldn't let her go.

It wasn't until he felt Catherine's hand on his shoulder that he moved. He closed her beautiful chocolate brown eyes, placed a kiss on her temple, and whispered in her ear, one last time.

"Sara, I love you too. I should've told you that so much sooner, but this is all I have. Goodbye, Butterfly."

Only after whispering his words of goodbye and hugging her close to him, her body still warm and soft, did he gently hand her off to the paramedics. David reached out to take her. He would not allow anyone else to perform this last duty.

"Cradle her head, please!" He sobbed as David began to gently pick her up.  
David did as he was told and cradled Sara's body much like she was sleeping, before carefully placing her onto the gurney and covering her with a blanket. David couldn't bring himself to place her in a body bag and treat her like every other DB. Once he was sure Sara was safe and secure David drove away. Pushing Gil right over the edge.

He broke down in Catherine's arms, not giving a single thought to the many people present or the horrible crime scene needing to be processed. He finally allowed him to give into the emotions that only Sara Sidle could bring out of him, dead or alive.

**So kindly leave me your thoughts and I promise to update as soon as my next chapter is beta'd. Thank you so much! Kayla. P.S. I promise all will get better soon.  
**


	2. Chapter 2

**Thanks Moochiecat!**

Gil Grissom had always prided himself on knowing what to do in any situation. But for the first time in his life he was at a loss. He had lost his best friend, his partner, his complete other half today - outside on that dark pavement. He felt almost as though he had lost one of his own limbs.

He paced around his office debating what he should do next. Should he go see Sara or start preparing for her funeral arrangements. After a long moment he decided to sit at his desk, that was when he saw it.

It was the first photo he had ever taken of Sara. He never knew if she knew about it. She was barely twenty one, and outside on the campus lawn in San Francisco. Her hair was shorter, and worn curly- his favorite way for her to wear it. She had attempted to pull it back, but to no avail, so it was splayed around her face. She had her sunglasses resting on the top of her head, she had just turned to face him with a huge smile on her face. For what reason he didn't know, but he took that photo, and after which she took his camera so he couldn't take anymore until the last day he was there. She took a photo of the both of them outside his lecture classroom. She was holding a textbook. That was his next favorite photo, mostly because she had taken it.

He spent the rest of the night in his office just looking over the photos he had of Sara and reminiscing. Each memory that was attached to every particular photo was dear to him. He was so lost in these thoughts that he didn't hear his phone ringing.

After Sara had been sent to the morgue, David and Al stood there for a moment just looking at the beautiful woman before them.

"I cannot believe that Sara is gone." David mumbled softly.

"Neither can I. Would you mind doing this one for me? I knew her too well. Like the daughter I never was blessed enough to have." Al asked as he went to go into the other room.

"Sure, Doc, sure. Sara. I'm really sorry about this honey." David told Sara even though she obviously wasn't actually hearing him. He picked up a scalpel and rested his hand against her collarbone and was preparing to cut. She was still really warm. Yes, he had cut fresh bodies before but this time it just felt different to him. However he brushed it aside and made the first incision.

What happened next made him gasp. She was bleeding. Sara's still form was bleeding. Dead bodies don't bleed because their hearts aren't beating. Without the beating heart blood does not circulate. So, if she was bleeding then her heart was still circulating blood, meaning it was beating. All of this meaning that Sara was alive, but in big trouble.

"Doc!" David screamed at the top of his lungs. "She's bleeding! Sara's alive!"

Al never moved so fast in all of his medical career. He quickly hooked her up to an oxygen source and began an IV to drip fluids, before adding a medical grade pain killer so that she wouldn't have to feel what was coming next. He carefully removed the three bullets that were lodged in her leg and sewed her up. When that was done he checked all of her vitals again.

She was breathing normally and her heart rate was back to normal. Due to the low grade dose of pain medication she would wake up soon, but would need a transfusion due to all her substantial blood loss.

"Call Gil and get him to meet her at the hospital! He's going to want to see her as soon as humanly possible. I'm going to call an ambulance to get her transported to Desert Palms. And then I'm going to personally sue the paramedics who pronounced her dead. Sara should never have ended up here." Doc said. ______________________________________________________________________

Gil had never driven so fast in his life to reach that hospital. He wasn't going to believe that she was alive and safe until he could hold her in his arms and listen to her tell him herself. After what had seemed like an eternity her Doctor appeared to speak to Gil. Because Gil was named as the executor of Sara's medical decisions the Doctor treated Gil as "next of kin." Just like she was in named as his medical "attorney by proxy," and the sole beneficiary to his savings and life insurance. (Though he hadn't informed her about the latter two).

"Hi, I'm Gil Grissom. How is she?"

"Well, physically she should be just fine. The Doctor who operated on her, knew what he was doing. Our only concern is her memory might be muddled. We did a CT scan and it all looks normal. But she woke up a moment ago and we tried to get her to tell us what she could remember of her accident. She couldn't do it. She is, however, asking for you, rather loudly, and rudely I might add." The Doctor told him.

"Her memory loss. Is it permanent?" Gil asked, ignoring the dig at Sara's attitude.

"We won't know until later. But victims of a traumatic accident often have a hard time remembering the accident itself. It's worse in patients who had an abusive childhood. They often end up blocking out years of their life, people and all. Their minds find temporary "safe haven," but in the long run, it's usually quite harmful. Did Ms. Sidle have an abusive childhood?"

"You've no idea. Can I see her now?" Gil asked, having no desire to give her Doctor the satisfaction of hearing about her life from him.

"I don't see why not. She's behind the first door." Gil was told rudely. At that point Gil knew he was gong to find Sara a different and more compassionate physician. "Sara?" Gil asked softly as he opened her door.

Her entire face lit up when she saw him, "Thank goodness you're here! I've heard the stupidest stories. That I was actually being autopsied and woke up and they had to run me to the hospital. She whined, sounding like a child, something she only ever did in front of him, and only when she was scared as hell.

He closed the distance between them, and hugged her. To his surprise she hugged him back, before she started to cry. He held her until she done, then scooted a chair close to her bed so he could talk to her.

"Sara, did the Doctors tell you about your memory?" He asked softly.

"Yes, and I'm scared. I can't remember anything before that conference you did in San Fran. I can remember you, and everything from that point on. With you in it anyway." She confided.

"But you can't remember anything from the accident?"

She turned a bright red and bowed her blushing face. "I may have lied about that to the Doctor. I remember what you were telling me, about not moving, And I recall what you told me before I was passed off to someone else. Did you mean it?" She whispered that last sentence.

He gave her that crooked smile that could melt her heart, "With every fiber of my being." And, then, he simply kissed her.

"Good. I'm going to hold you to it."

"I wouldn't expect anything less. I love you Sara. I was so sure I had lost you. Everyone told me you were dead. I didn't know what I was going to do. I promise you that I want to spend every day I live here on this earth - with you."

She was smiling and had tears in her eyes, "You don't know how long I've waited for you to say that and you sure as hell better mean it and stand by it, or you're going to be the one lying here with memory loss."

"Sara, I mean it. I love you so much." He kissed her again.

"Hold me, please." She asked him, as she scooted over to make room on the bed for him.

He willingly joined her there and wrapped his arms around her, holding her safe.

"Gil, I love you too." She whispered as she leaned in against him and fell asleep. (Almost dying can be exhausting.)

Gil spent the rest of the day just holding Sara, the only woman he ever wanted to be with, and was now lucky enough to have that chance.

"I promise I won't let you down because you're everything to me." He whispered as he kissed her temple and began to think of all the things he wanted her to know, and what he wished for them in the future. He had finally caught his Butterfly. He was never going to let her go. 


	3. Chapter 3

Gil had been sitting by Sara's bed side for nearly three days now, always greeting her with a smile and a kiss. This was the best medication for Sara's soul, if only it would help her memory. Gil had re-informed her about everyone on the team so that when they visited she would be able to know them a little bit. He had been hoping the team's visit would help bring at the very least parts pf her memory back.

"Sara? Would you be feeling up to having the team visit you today?" Gil asked her while he held her hand in both of his.

"I don't see why they can't. I'm feeling as healthy and whole as I did before, just muffled in my head with some things. With everything you've told me I can feel the pieces almost trying to fit together, they just need to be flipped to fit perfectly. I recognize all of their names and personas. Maybe seeing them will help."

"Well, okay. I'll go get them, they're in the hall." He informed her kissing her.

"Okay guys, now I've told Sara all about you and she is recollecting all of your names and, what I've told her. She's hoping that seeing you will help all the pieces ''click'' if you will. So please be gentle and patient with her." Gil informed them. They all nodded in unison.

When they entered her room, Gil returned to his seat by her bed and took one of her hands and held it, getting him a wink from Catherine in understanding. The entire team stood around her bed but away from it giving her a lot of space.

"Well come here. I'm not going to hit you." Sara told them earning her a laugh.

"It's Sara all right. How are you doing girl?" Nick asked her as he closed the distance between them and leaning down to hug her, before stopping to gauge her reaction. She smiled and nodded, so he could hug her.

"I'm okay. I'd like to go home. Thank you for asking. Nick?" Sara told him, before looking at Gil for confirmation on her choice of a name. He nodded to let her know that she was indeed talking to Nick.

This was the way of it, for each member of the team. Sara was able to tell who was who and was able to keep a conversation with each of them. They stayed all the afternoon and kept her and Gil company. When finally the time had come for them to leave, upon which Sara kissed Gil.

"I remembered who they all are! Granted I had to talk to them for awhile, but the pieces fell into place and I remember everything about them that I did before!" She said smiling at him excitingly.

"I knew you could do it. See all the progress you've made?"

"True. I'm just left wondering about my childhood. I mean I know all about them, you, us and almost everything after the conference, my job and I guess all that's left that is important anyway is our future." Sara told him.

"Well Sara I don't know about you, but you'd be making me the happiest man in the world if you agreed to marry me. However I completely understand if it is too soon for you. And as for your childhood, I could inform you of it if you'd like, but it wasn't pretty, so this is all up to you and what you'd like to see happen."

"Gil, of course I'll marry you, and soon too. I've waited nearly ten years for you. I'm not going to wait any longer if I don't have too. And, as for my childhood, maybe if it is as bad as you say, maybe I'm better off not knowing. For now at least."

"Well I'll tell you whatever you want to know, so long as I know the answer of course."

"Come up here with me. Tell me about how I ended up in here. I know that I don't know that." Sara told him.

"We had just ended shift, and we all went out to breakfast as a team. You were getting ready to leave but your car wouldn't start, and naturally, being the gentlemen that I am I offered to drive you home. You accepted, with a very rude glare I might add, not that I didn't have it coming. We were silent the entire way to your apartment complex. I was going to walk you up to your door, despite this, because I was planning on apologizing to you, and finally telling you how I felt, but as we began to walk towards the stairwell Mitchell Haynes popped out of nowhere. Do you remember him?" Gil asked her.

"No. Should I?"

"Well he's another bad memory. He was your personal stalker. Anyway I guess he was waiting for you, but lost it when he saw you with me, and that I had my hand on your lower back, he flipped out. Yelling about how you cheated on him, and such before pulling his gun, making you pull yours. I tried to negotiate with him, to no avail. He fired once and missed, you shot twice hitting him in the chest, but he got off three rounds. He was aiming for your chest, but because he was falling he got you in the leg. You hit your head on the way down. I held you until paramedics arrived and those stupid asses proclaimed you dead. So one very long night, a law suit and a surgery later, we arrive here." Gil finished.

"Wow. I had my own stalker. A law suit? Who is suing whom?" Sara asked her brow crinkled.

"It appears that Al is suing them, and any money he receives is going to you directly. Along with the law suit the crime lab is filing in your name, so you'll be getting money for that too."

"Well no one needed to do that. At least now we'll have money to put toward our wedding and such. Unless you've changed your mind."

"Sara I would never change my mind. I love you. Now relax and get a good nights sleep. You get to leave tomorrow." Gil said kissing her.

"Good. I'm tired of being here. I love you too. Where am I staying?"

"Well if you'd like you can just move in with me. I don't want you back at those apartments."

"Okay. I'll move in with you. Fiancé." She smiled at him.

"I'd be most honored to have your company, Sara Sidle almost Grissom."

**Reviews please! I'll update sooner!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Thank you to my beta, Moochiecat!**

"Gil?" Sara called, looking up from a photo of herself and a man that she wasn't familiar with. She couldn't identify him as either Gil, Nick, Warrick, or Greg. "Who is this?"

"Oh. That is your older brother." Gil answered as he entered his home and set down the rest of Sara's belongings. (The majority of her things having been moved in already).

"Well, why didn't he come visit me? Does he live far away? Or do we just not get along?" She asked, putting the photo back in its home on the mantel.

Gil had absolutely no idea how he was going to respond to his fiancee's questions. He never wanted her to have to experience the pain of her childhood again if she didn't have too. Especially since she had said that perhaps she was better off not knowing. But as he looked into her chocolate brown eyes he saw curiosity and wonder. All she had to do was ask and he would tell her anything she wanted to know. But she hadn't asked, yet, simply because she wasn't completely certain that she wanted to know.

"Sara, come with me." Gil said, grasping her hand and leading her down the long hallway until they reached his office. He set her gently on the couch and walked over to a file cabinet and pulled out a very large binder labeled simply, 'Sara' on the spine.

He handed her the binder as he sat down next to her. "I'll tell you anything and everything you'd like to know, so long as I know the answer. Now, this binder is full of things from your childhood, teens and some more recent events - but all are related. I'm telling you this because I love you, but there are things in that binder that are very graphic and painful. But it belongs to you."

"Okay." She said. "The man in the picture?"

"That was your brother Jason. He's two years older than you, so he's thirty-two. The two of you were separated when you were placed in foster care. He ,however, was able to contact you, and you've corresponding for about two years now. He still lives in California and is married with children. We did tell him about your accident, but due to some recent events he decided he had better not come and see you yet. He would like to visit you again soon though. I have a folder full of letters, emails, and such between the two of you as well, for you to look at whenever you're ready." Gil informed her softly.

Sara didn't say anything for a while. When she did she was very calm and quiet about it. "Thank you for telling me that. I'll look at this as well as those letters at a later point. We should, uh, probably start unpacking the rest of my things so we're not living in a mess." She said, placing the binder on Gil's desk as she headed out the door back down the hall.

When Gil caught up with her she was organizing their books.

"Sara, are you alright?" He asked, softly. coming up behind her.

"Huh? I'm fine. Well, books are out of the way. What do you want to eat?" Sara was definitely trying to change the subject.

That was how the rest of the evening went. Sara didn't ask Gil a single thing except along the lines of unpacking. Finally they ended up in bed. Gil told Sara "Good night," and how much he loved her. She only smiled softly at him in return, before cuddling up next to him and closing her eyes, signaling that she didn't want to speak any further.

It was few hours later and Gil rolled over to realize that Sara was not in bed with him. He wandered down the hallway into the office where the light was on and he could hear a soft crying. She was huddled in the middle of the floor, the contents of the binder and the folder splayed out around her. There were a million tiny sticky notes, all containing questions stuck to the forms, papers and pictures.

"Sara?" Gil started. Her head snapped up in response so quickly it startled him.

"No wonder I'm a mess! This was my life! Hell, this is my life! Because of things like this, I can't remember a damn thing from the last thirty years! My entire life is blank Gil! Everything is gone, except you and the damn lab! Why is that?" She shrieked as the tears ran like a waterfall down her face. Gil was utterly quiet.

"Damn it! Answer me, Gilbert! You know the answers, I don't! How could all of this have happened to one human being? Is that even possible?"

Gil closed the distance between them, joining her on the floor, until he was able to cradle her against him, and hold her until the sobbing stopped.


	5. Chapter 5

**Okay this one goes out specifically to my beta Moochiecat! I hope I don't disappoint.**

After the events of the night before, when Gil and Sara woke up the next morning, each was very tired, not to mention Sara had a headache and sore eyes. Which didn't brighten either one of their outlooks on the world.

"How are you doing this morning?" Gil asked her softly handing her a cup of coffee, which she took gratefully.

"I'm doing alright. I'm sorry I completely wigged out on you. You must thing I'm completely insane."

"Sara, I do not think you to be insane. Don't apologize, for your emotions, they're what make us who we are. And in your situation I don't blame you in the slightest for reacting in the manner that you did. I'm a forty-six year old man, I even admit, I'd probably react similarly, if not worse." Gil told her patting her hand.

She smiled softly, "Well I'm just glad I can put it all to rest now. I've got most, if not all of the pieces of my puzzle back together again. Well most of them, something isn't sitting right with me with one of the memories. I assume it's just blocked because of self preservation skills, and my brain doesn't want to relive it yet. If ever. I do hope it comes back soon though, it's like trying to go through a wall-literally."

"I'm sure in time it will, or perhaps something will just trigger it, things like that do happen."

"Yes, I know."

"You just need some patience."

"Patience? Gil when have you ever known me to have patience of any kind?"

"Never."

"Exactly. Never. So this is all the more frustrating to me, than it would be to a human being that worked on a normal level!" Sara said throwing up her hands exasperated.

"I'm sorry honey."

"Trust me you will be, when I use all the hot water. I'm showering before we go into work and have to deal with everyone- Eckile especially. You'd better not complain either. Oh, by the way, I love you!" She called as she wondered back down the hallway. Leaving Gil to only chuckle and nod his head.

While Sara was in the shower Gil changed his clothes and called Catherine and asked her to make sure that everyone knew about Sara, so that they didn't get upset if for some reason she wasn't able to remember them, and caution all of them to take it easy on her.

When that was done Gil fed Hank, and went in search of his ring box. It contained a wedding ring, the one he intended to give to Sara. The trick however was finding it. He knew it wouldn't be in a box, or his clothing drawers, leaving him to search everywhere until he finally found it in his desks top drawer. He opened the lid of the box, it was just as perfect as he remembered it.

The ring was a platinum band with a heart shaped diamond in the middle. Its accompanying band was also platinum with tiny diamonds embedded throughout the band. What didn't expect was Sara to sneak up on him.

"Pretty, got another girl you're planning on proposing too?" She asked nonchalantly form the doorway, a cute smile on her lips.

"Well actually there is this woman who happens to be, perfect, beautiful, smart, and possibly the most infuriating person when it comes to waiting." Gil replied smiling at her.

"Oh, really? Too bad she's not here."

"What if I said she was right in front of me?"

"I'd say I love you so much, you've no idea, and the ring is way to much and beautiful beyond imaging. Also I'm infuriating, but I'm not apologizing for anything else."

I wouldn't expect you too. Here, let me see your hand." Gil said sliding the ring onto Sara's finger. "I love you too by the way." He added kissing her .

"Good, then that means you get to keep me safe from all the crazy people at work."

"Work?"

"Yes. We go solve crimes, catch bad guys and then paid for it, lot's of fun. Let's go babe."

"As you wish my dear." He replied grasping her hand in his own as they headed out the door.

Okay, sorry if you all didn't like, but I had to make a happy chapter, so this made me happy, hopefully you agree. Now I won't be able to update anymore until next Monday, probably. Because for one of my courses I have to take home a robotic baby. It acts just like real babies and I'm in charge of caring for it. I'm not a mother, so this will be an interesting weekend. Hopefully do good because my grade depends on it. As well as my sanity. So wish me luck and I'll try to post again Monday. Thank you!! J

To see the ring-

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	6. Chapter 6

"Gil, I do not want to go in there." Sara said from her position sitting next to Gil in the vehicle facing the entry way of the Crime Lab.

"Okay, you do not have too." He answered.

"Ah, yes I do. I need, we need a paycheck, not to mention I'm going to have to go in there eventually, and see Ecklie. I'm just whining."

"Well I in no way blame you."

"I know. Just stay close?" She asked nervously.

"Of course I will dear."

"Good. Let's go get this over with."

"I cannot believe that man! He wants to make me a CSI two! I know I hit my head, but that makes no since in any scenario! Do you know all the hoops I had to jump through in the first place to make three?!" Sara ranted as she paced the living room.

"Sara I …."

"And did you hear what he said about us getting married? I how do you get up in the morning and live with yourself after you do the things he does? He cannot tell us we can't be married and have a family. He has no right!" She continued through Gil's attempt to speak to her.

"Sara,…"

"Are you going to say anything about this entire situation?" She turned to him.

"Well if you'd calm down, I've been trying to speak with you."

"Oh, sorry. Go ahead." She said sitting down opposite him.

"I will speak to Ecklie, so that you can keep your job, and if I need to leave CSI, I will. I can easily get a teaching job, and truthfully, I think I'd enjoy that more than being supervisor. Catherine, or even you could easily take over for me, you're more than ready." Gil said.

"You'd do that for me?"

"For us. Besides I had considered leaving for awhile, now I actually have a good reason."

"Okay, well good. Make Catherine supervisor, not me. I like solving crimes, not doing paperwork." Sara said wrinkling up her nose.

"I think I can do that. Besides, this way, you'll still be working with the team, and not to be too protective, but I think I'd feel most comfortable, with you in their hands especially since we'd no longer be working together."

"Wow, us not working together. Weird thought."

"I know, but we agreed it's for the best." Gil concluded.

**I apologize for the short length, I am currently fighting writers block for quite a few of my stories. I have some new ideas for new stories that I will be posting, so please look for those and read, and be patient with me, I will update my other stories as well, just as soon as I feel I have some inspiration for a great chapter.**


	7. Chapter 7

"Gil?" Sara called in a small voice.

"Yes, dear?"

"What do we do now?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, you're going to be teaching, but you'd be doing that during the day. I have to go to work still and I'll be gone at night, we'll never see each other. I don't like that idea. I don't like it at all." Sara said from her curled position on the couch.

"Well we have a few options. I can teach night courses, however, if we look down the road a few years, you said you'd like to have children, and I hear they function best sleeping at night, due to school and such during the day. But, if you wanted I don't see why we cant move you and the team to days." Gil mused aloud to her.

"Would they do that though?"

"Yes, Catherine would in a heartbeat, she hates that she works the grave shift, It could only help Warrick's marriage, Greg is very adaptable, and Nick, well I don't think he would care either way."

"Okay, so we suggest it, tonight then?" Sara asked.

"I think we can do that, it can't make anything worse, they're going to be mad, we got married, without them there." Gil said.

"Okay, but then they'll see how happy we are, then they'll be happy for us."

"You're right."

"I always am."

"Okay, guys Sara and I need you take a seat and listen with open minds for a moment, tonight will be a night of changes, but hopefully good ones." Gil informed everyone before continuing.

"As you all know, Eckile said he would fire me, if Sara and I got married, now when have you ever known either of us to follow the rules? So we got married anyway, and before you all complain, we have a video of it, that you all can watch. But because of our marriage tonight is my last night on the job. I will be teaching at WLVU from now on. Catherine, that means you've been promoted to supervisor. Congratulations." Gil finished leaving the floor open for Sara.

"Okay, before you all have a communal heart attack there's one more thing, that I am specifically asking from all of you, I understand if you do not wish too, but then that may mean my leaving. I would like to move our entire team to days, and move days to grave. We have permission to do this from the mayor and the sheriff. But, Gil and I want a family, and I'd like to be there for my kids when they get off the bus, Catherine I'm sure you'd like the same with Lindsay. But it's up to you." Sara finished before sitting down next to Gil.

"I'm in." Catherine said happily. "Do you know how long I've wanted to be day shift supervisor?"

"No problem darlin." Nick said with a large smile and a wink.

"This is going to make Tina exceedingly happy, I'm game." Warrick said smiling largely like the rest.

"Great!" Sara exclaimed. "We have an entire week off, after tonight to get used to our new schedule." Sara said before leaving to go change.

"Thank you, you guys. What you just did it meant everything to her." Gil told them all.

"It's no problem Gil, this seems to the perfect move for everyone involved. Except for you. Won't you miss this?" Catherine asked.

"No. I won't. I've taught you all everything I know, you don't need me anymore, and Catherine you're more than ready to taking over. Now I get a pay raise and get to teach all over again, which is something I love." Gil answered her. "Besides, I know I'm leaving my wife in safe hands." He added.

"You teaching in forensic sciences then?" Warrick asked.

"Yes, and don't be surprised when I call on all of you, to be my guest speakers."

"Yay! Field trip!" Nick said. Causing everyone to laugh.

"So, boss, what's our last grave shift case load?" Catherine asked.

"We only have one scene, so as soon as Sara gets back we'll leave." He answered her.

"Whoa, what happened here?" Nick asked as they all filed one by one into the home that was their crime scene.

"I don't know Nicky, but it sure doesn't look good." Warrick answered him.

Sara didn't say anything as she surveyed the room, she kept feeling like she was being hit with déjà vu, but not from anything recent, from something in her past that she couldn't out her finger on. She tried to push it aside as she photographed in the bedroom, but once she looked in the corner, she knew, that the memory was going to free itself despite her knowing she didn't want to know.

She sat down on the opposite wall, and let her head fall to her knees, as the memory played in her mind, she kept trying to find the off button, but there wasn't one. She was being forced to watched against her own will. Sara didn't realize she was screaming until, Gil was shaking her shoulder.

"What happened?" He asked her urgently as the team stood behind him concerned for Sara.

"I think I just saw what was in the file all by itself, I never opened that one, I was too afraid to remember what was in it, and I think I just found out what it was about." Sara said before sobbing.

"It's all right, Sara, come on I'll take you home." Gil said as he helped her up and handed her camera off to Catherine. "I'll call you guys later." He told them.

"Sara, do you want to talk about it?" Gil asked her gently as they sat in the living room.

"Okay, maybe you can help it make more since." Sara answered him

All right, so I hoped you enjoyed the update, we will find out what Sara remembered in the next chapter, Review please!


	8. Chapter 8

"I was a little girl maybe six or seven, and I was asleep in my bed, when I heard horrible yelling and a crunching sound, which immediately woke me up, and then the next thing I know is that a man is coming into my room, despite the pleadings of a woman, who is only slapped hard across the face. The man pulls back my comforter and sits down next to me, with his hand on my knee, then the memory changes, and this time I'm older, maybe sixteen, seventeen years old."

"That same man comes in, only this time there is no woman pleading for me safety, and I don't let the man touch me in anyway, I hit him hard with something so that he falls over, then the woman comes in and killed the man in front of me, then a boy, older than me, takes me down the hall, and that's all I remember seeing, but the feelings were so horrible." Sara was able to tell Gil as they sat on the couch in their home.

"Finally the last part is of when I'm older, and the older man from the room, is back and he wants to talk to me, but I slammed the door in his face and then move to someplace else."

"What was that memory Gil? I know you know." Sara asked softly as she held her husbands hand.

"That Sara, was your Father, Mother and brother. Your Father used to molest you, and one night your mom shot him so that he would leave you alone, and your brother was the man that removed you from that scene. However, I don't know anything about that last memory, it must've been something you never shared with me." Gil told her softly as she started to cry.

Gil held her softly as she cried her self out, only to end up over the toilet vomiting. Once she was done Gil helped her bed, before heading into his study, to call Catherine.

"Hey Catherine, I need a favor from you. I know it's going to sound crazy and like I'm paranoid, and maybe I am, but I need you to do a little research for me."

"_Okay, shoot." She replied._

"Okay, first off, I know you know about Sara's past, but she doesn't know that, and doesn't ever need to know that. Got it?" He clarified.

"_Yes."_

"I want you to get online from the lab accounts, and I want you to delete, destroy, anything you have to, to remove Sara's information. The only thing I want left are her name with my last name, her photo and the home number. Nothing else. Remove everything about her childhood too. Understand?"

"_I, umm, okay?"_

"Finally I want you to look into a Trenton Sidle. He was Sara's Father, and based on the memory that she uncovered today, he isn't dead like we thought and is trying to contact her. So find out if he is alive or dead, and where he's located."

"_Okay, I'll get back to you." Catherine breathed, as she realized the seriousness of the situation._

Gil then took all of the files and paperwork and anything pertaining to Sara and locked in the safe. After he was done he went to check on Sara, but she wasn't in bed, this confusing Gil thinking she would've just fallen asleep.

"Sara?" He called softly. He didn't a typical response, only a retching noise from the bathroom. As he followed the noise he knew it was Sara and he knew it was bad. Sara always closed doors behind her, even to peoples dismay. It didn't matter what was going on, if she walked into a room, any room, the door would be shut. And the bathroom door was wide open.

"Sara, are you all right ?" Gil asked as he came to stand behind her and hold her hair.

"It wo, wo, won't stop." She managed to tremble out, between her sobs.

"What won't stop?" Gil asked her gently, turning her face towards him.

"My thought, I can't get my head to shut up, and then I'll end up thinking about something specific and the next thing I know I'm in here." She whined.

Gil kissed her forehead. "Why don't you take a shower and relax, I'm going to make you a cup of tea, and see if Al will look at you, I'm worried about you Sara. So can you do that for me?"

She merely nodded as Gil left the confines of the bathroom.

"Thank you for doing this Al." Gil said as AL prepared to leave the Grissom home.

"It's no problem. I'll call you once her results are in. Take care of her." Al answered as he left.

To Gil's happiness, when he went to check on Sara she was fast asleep. She looked so different when she was asleep than when she was awake. Her worry lines in her forehead were soothed out, her normally straight hair lay all over the pillows in tiny curls, and her long, lithe body was curled up into the fetal position. And there was almost always a smile on her face, which was a blessing seeing as how, you had to really work at it to get her to smile at you when she wasn't comatose.

Gil was pulled from his admiring thoughts by Catherine.

"Cat, what are you doing here?" Gil asked as he allowed the redhead inside.

"This was way to big, to tell you over the phone, and you sounded like you wanted to know, anything I had."

"True, Here have a seat and tell me all about it." Gil gestured towards the couch. "Just be quite, Sara's finally asleep."

"Okay, I was doing as you said and going through and removing everything on Sara, when I realized her account had been hacked. So I had Archie find the hacker and it was non other than Trenton Sidle. At first I thought maybe they were different people, but I found his location, Gil. It was the apartments where Sara was shot. Now I don't know for certain that he's connected to Sara being shot, but she was the only one hit, and the rest of us were easy targets, since we were trying to take care of her."

"That never did make since, but if you're right, then Sara was the only target and that's why she was the one hit. But then how does Mitchell Haynes fit into all of this?" Gil added in.

" I'm not sure yet, but there was another man at the scene he was never arrested, if he is Sara's Father, Haynes could've been working for him, and he wanted to see the job go down. So we're bringing him in now and are going to run a DNA sample to see if he is Sara's Father then…." Catherine was cut off by Gil's ringing cell phone.

"Oh, it's Al, I need to answer this. Grissom?"

"She's what? Six weeks? Okay, okay, I will. You're sure? All right, thanks Al." Gil hung up the phone in a daze.

"Grissom?" Catherine called snapping her fingers to his attention.

"Can you keep a secret Cath?"

"Yes!"

"Sara's pregnant. We're going to be parents."

"Wow, congratulations. Well I'll let you go, so you can talk to her, and I won't say anything, and I'll keep you posted with Trenton." Catherine said smiling as she hugged Grissom.

"Thanks Cath." Gil smiled back. "And I'm serious, no one finds out."

"Noted." She called as she left.

After she was gone, Gil crawled into bed a long side Sara, and fell asleep with a giant smile on his face.

So, please leave me your thoughts they mean a lot to me ;)


	9. Chapter 9

"Hey, Sara. How are you doing today?" Gil asked as he felt Sara wake and stretch out much like a cat.

"I'm doing okay. I'm sorry about last night." She said leaning her head against his chest.

"It's okay Sara. But I do have some things that I need to tell you. Some good and some bad. Which do you want first?" Gil asked as he drew patterns on Sara's arm.

"The bad."

"I was afraid of that. Okay, I had Catherine do a little research, based on your memory and it turns out you were right. Your Father is alive, and in Vegas, at your old apartments actually. We think Haynes was working for him, you were the only one hit and the rest of the team was there, and there was never a move for the rest of us." Gil told her as he felt her stiffen.

"I was really hoping that was a figment of my imagination." Sara sighed. Gil was about to answer her when, she leapt from the bed, hand clamped over her mouth and headed to the bathroom. Gil smiled softly as he followed his wife and held her hair as she was sick.

"You know this is getting really annoying. Did doc tell you what I had, because if this is the flu it's irritating." Sara muttered to Gil before washing out her mouth and crawling back into the warm covers of the bed.

Gil smiled as he rejoined Sara. "Actually he did tell me what you had, and it's not the flu. Here this is for you." Gil said handing Sara a teddy bear.

"Oh, Gil I love it. But what's it for?" She smiled up at him.

"Look." he told her.

"Okay." She muttered as she looked the very soft bear over, she froze when she read what the bear's stomach read; _To a new Mommy_ .

"Wait, me? I'm pregnant? We're pregnant?" Sara said before exploding into a huge grin and giggling.

"Yes, we are." Gil agreed with a huge smile of his own, as he kissed Sara.

"This is really happening."

"And I'm glad that it is."

"Me too, bugman. Me too." Sara agreed.

"Well my dear, as much as I would like to stay here in bed with you, all day, we do need to get ready for work. Well I do. You get the day off." Gil said as he headed to the closet.

"Wait why do I get the day off?" Sara called confused.

"Because you had a very long night and are carrying my child, also, because I said so, so you get the day off."

"You know normally I don't care what you say, and I do what I want to anyway. But today I'll let go. I guess I should schedule a doctors appointment, and go to the store." Sara called back to him.

"I think it's a great idea, however, Nick will be going with you."

"Why? Sara asked as she joined him in the closet.

"Because we don't have your Father in custody yet, and he hacked your work account so he knows where you are, and I'm not about to leave you all by yourself. Regardless of Hank the best guard dog, and your gun skills."

"Okay. When is Nick getting here?"

"In about half an hour. I've got to go dear, I love you." He said kissing her tenderly on the lips. "And you." He said placing a kiss on her stomach, making her giggle.

"We love you too, now earn us some money." Sara teased. "Hey, so what do I call if I need to get a hold of you? You're teaching now, and I don't have a work number."

"Oh, yes, I left all that info on the fridge. It's a little weird working days, but I think we'll get used to it."

"I agree. Okay, so call me when you can."

"I will my love. Take care of both of you."

"I will." Sara agreed as she placed her hand on her abdomen.

* * *

By the time Sara was showered and dressed and had thrown up one more time, an hour had passed.

"Hey Nick, I'm sorry. It's been a long night and morning apparently." Sara apologized as she entered the kitchen and saw Nick reading on her couch.

"Oh, no worries. How are you this morning?"

"Surprisingly well. I guess I should just tell you this now, otherwise you'll have figured it out today while we're out. I'm pregnant." Sara couldn't help but smile as she said that.

"Oh! Sara that's great! I'm happy for you girl." Nick said hugging her.

"Thanks Nick. Don't say anything though, I don't think I was supposed to say anything yet, but I couldn't help it."

"I won't say a word. So what are we doing today?"

"Shopping I guess. Sorry you got stuck babysitting." Sara said as she grabbed her purse.

"Oh, I don't mind. I get to hang out with you."

"Okay, just let me call Gil, and We'll go. It's his first day teaching." Sara called the all to familiar cell number and only got his voice mail so she left him a message.

"Hey, Gil, It's me. I'm heading out with Nick. I hope your day is going well, baby and I are doing fine. Call me later."

"I hate leaving voice mails." She muttered getting a chuckle from Nick.

"Okay, so I'm taking the liberty here and , I'm driving." Nick said as he opened up the passenger door for Sara.

"Okay." She muttered.

"You want to tell me why you have this odd need to drive all the time?" Nick asked as they headed to town.

"I don't know, control I guess. If I'm driving I'm in charge."

"Oh, you always have to be in charge?"

"No, not always, just most of the time."

"How does that work for your marriage?"

"Well actually. I do what I want, he does what he wants, no stress."

"Lucky you."

"I know. Okay, you ready to shop?"

"Let's get to it darlin." Nick smiled opening up her door for her.

"Okay, so we'll start with produce." Sara muttered as Nick followed her with the cart, as she would randomly throw things in. When she was done there they moved to meats, where Nick had to suppress a laugh as Sara made faces every time she placed hamburger or chicken into the cart.

"Okay, all done. I need to stop by books, that all right with you?" Sara asked as they headed back to the Denali.

"Yeah, I got something I need to pick up there anyway." Nick answered her.

* * *

"Okay, this should be easy. I'll get What to Expect when you're expecting, and I'll get Gil, The expecting Father. Okay, I'm all done. What are you getting?" Sara asked as she followed Nick to his part of the store.

"I'm getting Stiff and Spook."

"Oh I've read Stiff I really liked it, you'll have to tell me how the other one is." Sara said.

"Will do. Let's get you home, before Gil beats us there." Nick winked at her.

"Okay."

"Thank you, for helping out today. I really appreciated it Nick. I guess I'll see you tomorrow." Sara smiled.

"You got it girl. Take care." Nick hugged her as he left.

Sara put groceries away as she waited for Gil to come home, she checked her phone and there was no call from him, so she decided to start reading her book. She was about halfway through the first chapter, when her front door opened.

"Gil?" Sara called.

"Hello, dear." He answered her as he placed his coat on the hook and set his briefcase down.

"So, how was your first day?" Sara asked excitedly, as he joined her on the couch.

"It was perfect. I forgot how much I loved teaching. The students were great, and all very interested in what we were going to be learning." Gil smiled at her.

"How was your day?"

"Great. I bought groceries and I bought me a book and you one as well." Sara smiled as she handed him the book.

"Oh, this should be interesting." he smiled.

"I thought so. I have an appointment Friday at six. I chose six so you could come." Sara informed him.

"Okay, I'll be there. Are you ready for bed? I'm tired." Gil stifled a yawn.

"Yeah, let's go. I think that's the first time you've neat me to bed." Sara giggled as she followed her husband.

"Well who said I was going first?" Gil asked as he wrapped his arms around Sara and lead her to the bed.

"Oh I see, tired huh?" She teased.

"Tired of being away from you." He mumbled as he placed kisses across her jaw.

"Me too." She agreed as she moved so they were fully on the bed and her lips collided with his, as they fell into bliss.

* * *

I hope you all liked. I do not own any of the book titles mentioned please don't sue me! I have read Stiff and I recommend reading it, if Science and the body is interesting to you, it's also very funny. Please review!


	10. Chapter 10

Sorry for not updating sooner!

Gil had left for work and Sara was just finishing getting ready to leave to the lab, when she heard a knock on her front door. "I'm coming!" Sara yelled as she finished pulling on her boots.

She looked through the peep hole but the person had his back to the door, so Sara ever cautiously opened her door.

"May I help you?" She asked politely as the man turned around.

Sara felt the air catch in her chest, and her body recoil as she looked at the man. "Oh dear." She mumbled as she moved to slam the door shut, but the man was quicker than she was, and had entered her home.

"Hello, Sara. You've grown up good." Trenton Sidle taunted his daughter.

"What the hell are you doing here?" Sara spat as she rounded the island in the kitchen and grabbed the phone, pressing the number one, knowing it would contact Brass immediately.

"I just wanted to see my little girl. And it seems you're not so little anymore." Trenton stepped closer to Sara who continued to move away from her father. But when she turned to run for the door, he grabbed her ankle causing her to land a heap on the carpet in the living room.

"Oh, the last time I saw you, you slammed a door in my face, and you were about to do the same thing again today. Now is that anyway to treat your Father?" He asked as she backed up to the couch and was huddled against it.

Sara didn't respond she flipped over and headed for the door one last time.

"You know Sara, I'm getting really tired of you running away from me, I mean you'd think I was a criminal or something." He said as he latched on to Sara's hair and pulled her back before slamming her head against the wall. The last thing Sara heard before going unconscious was, "Daddy's home."

When Sara woke up she was aware of a throbbing in her head, and a hand holding hers, as well as the ever annoying beeping sound of a monitor of some sort.

"Sara?" Gil called to her softly.

"Gil?" She asked muddled as she tried to remember why she was in the hospital.

"It's me." He answered her.

"Why am I in the hospital? Is that baby okay?" She asked becoming more alert by the minute.

"The baby is just fine Sara. You're in the hospital because your Father attacked you."

"Was he caught?"

"I'm afraid not. He managed to evade police as they were trying to take care of you."

The worry lines reappeared between Sara's eyebrows as she looked at her husband.

"Sara, we will catch him. I promise, he won't hurt you ever again."

She nodded.

"I love you Sara. Get some sleep, I'll be here when you wake up." Gil kissed her forehead as she fell back asleep.

"Jim, what the hell is going on? You were supposed to have him in custody three day ago! Now my wife is laying in intensive care!" Gil seethed.

"Gil, I know. I'm doing everything I can. This is one sneaky son of a bitch. I'm going to have two officers outside Sara's door, and two outside you're home door from now, until he is caught. I'm really sorry."

"I know. I just don't know how to protect her. I can't be with her all day everyday. And she shouldn't have to live in fear."

"I promise I won't stop until I catch him. How's she doing?" Jim asked softly.

"She'll be all right. He worked her over pretty good, but she and the baby will be fine."

"Good, that's good. Go be with your wife, I've got everything handled. Catherine's processing your house as we speak." Jim informed him, as a man came and asked to speak to Gil.

"Are you Gil Grissom?" He asked.

"Yes, and you are?"

"I'm Jason. Jason Sidle, I'm Sara's brother."

* * *

Okay i know it was short, and i'm sorry. But we'll see more of Sara's family in the next chapter. Tell me what you think!


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